The journey home

Off we go

Every single synchronicity, resource, and miracle (and believe me, there’s been some very bizarre and woo-woo ones) has aligned and cleared the path for this vision to become a reality.

From one small idea, to a profound reality, this project has been propelled by powerful forces. 

IT'S A FULL BODY FUCK YES

Hearing and believing that clear inner voice is too.

hired 22 skilfully talented teachers and coaches, fine-tuned signature formats, and are gearing up for the most expansive 5 years (to start) of our lives.

A beautiful leadership team, teaching and coaching staff, and facilities crew have naturally come together to fill our space with life and knowledge. While I know in every cell of my being that I’m supposed to be right here, right now, I am humbled by the ease and congruency of this collective of souls and the magic we get to create together. 

I’m reflecting with gratitude on the opportunity to empower the voices of the unique expression of this team in a space where those who arrive feel like home.

We have secured our space, permitted the build, and begun construction;

I’m here to share from my soul some incredibly deep and honest information, being the biggest growth I’ve ever known thus far.

I have tears coming down my face as I write this beautiful letter to share my inner-world with you...

I wasn’t truly happy. I feigned happiness for the fleeting satisfaction of being praised, leaving my inner child wounded and ignored for superficial validation.

I tried everything. As a wellness leader, mental health advocate, and yoga therapist, I questioned, if I couldn’t figure it out, then who could?

“IF THIS IS HOW YOUR LIFE WILL BE EVERY DAY FOR THE REST OF IT, WOULD THAT BE ENOUGH FOR YOU?”

This daunting question from my coach left me paralyzed. The answer was no. It wasn’t enough. I had spent years knowing there was more. So, I became desperate for change.

It was time. I took my work seriously, committing to healing my most shamed parts, engaging in daily sacred practices, plant medicine, and somatic therapy. Primarily, it involved being accountable for my healing.

Layers began to shed: relationships, unresolved painful memories, the belief that I was unlovable if people saw the real me, and unworthy behaviors. I learned to accept myself, reparent my unmet needs, comfort my frightened self, and forgive my ignorance. I explored my coping mechanisms, tested new boundaries, experienced pain, cried, and stood up again. I participated in sacred ceremonies, formed new habits, confronted survival tactics, and embraced both the darkness and light within me. I acknowledged the deep need to be seen and the fear that comes with it. I gave myself permission to be confused and to know.

I’ve always appeared strong, certain, and confident. Because of this, I believed I always presented the most authentic version of myself. I hid nothing, as it empowered me to embrace my pain.

This is why this moment is so poignant. I've realized that, while I was doing my best, I was living as a shadow of myself. My life had been consumed by seeking acceptance and validation from others to feel worthy of love. This created an underlying system of self-abandonment and a shutdown of my intuition, true inner security, and the ability to meet my own needs.

Here’s what my less desirable traits looked like, to be honest:

  • Controlling insecurities
  • Bulldozing people
  • Manipulating to ensure my psychological safety
  • Codependency to feel needed
  • Protecting my heart
  • Anger towards the world
  • An inflamed ego at the hint of being proven wrong or feeling defensive
  • Inability to make decisions without reassurance from others
  • Lack of self-awareness, preventing me from communicating my needs
  • Hiding myself yet resenting others for not understanding me
  • Intense self-criticism and criticism of others

The Reckoning

Sit back and get curious

It’s not everyday that we have the opportunity to consciously awaken to the reality of our lives. Nor the possibility to renegotiate it’s terms after shedding many dense obstructive layers that paralyzed me into fear and disallowed the full expression of my genuine gifts.

To our community

The breath in my body, this presence, this powerful life force, clarified everything. I stopped fighting. I allowed these deep, unmet, and unseen feelings space, validation, and recognition. Facing my inner shadow, I declared,

Finally Acknowledged

And all of the sudden, I felt free.

“Babe, I’m right here with you.”

What now?

I'd rather go through the sobering, excruciating reckoning of self forgiveness any day than stay asleep on the pedestal of ego.

Every moment of that brought me into the mending of the painful wounds that I always deeply knew would show me how to free myself.

This meant going in the dark room, it meant owning my perceived limitations and questioning them, it meant rising to the version of me that the world actually needs - and that little Ashley has always needed me right there with her - to hold her hand and guide her.

I am present with every demand, agreement, exchange, integration, and detail of this gorgeous space that will be a home for all of our pieces and parts.

So here I stand. Ready to play in my undeniable BIGNESS taking everyone who is ON BOARD with values, rituals, commitment to light, and life path, and finally letting go of habits, people, and self harming tendencies I’ve been chasing to share my mission.

I know that I'm not alone in that desire.

And I know that what I want to give, the world deeply needs.

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I know that the Universe has a beautiful way of always supporting without exception, expectation, or conditions.

I am delighted to give every cell of my being into the forward progress and success of this space and I do so by opening the lens of curiosity, risk, excitement, challenge, adventure, and creation.

I have seen the power of my YES move mountains–whether it’s volunteering for nonprofits or prisons, or serving lucrative contracts with big companies.

I have had the honor of learning selfless service through sharing my work.

Calling us forward

Ashley Rae Shubert

So join me now,

However, I know that standing on my little grass hill with a victory flag by myself sounds like the loneliest place imaginable.

The greatest gift I could ever receive is knowing I am creating something of value that makes the world a better place.